Got a call about a stray animal, it was on some guy’s
property, sitting in a planter, looked fearsome enough that the caller didn’t
want to put it on a leash or anything, just was standing way back, waiting for
the pro… me… Hahaha! I checked our
system on the laptop in my truck, and texted my partner who was on vacation on
the other side of the continent. Seems like a very similar animal has been
impounded as a stray, trespassing, threatening other residents in the area,
twice in the last six months.
I rolled up to the apartment in question, the reporting
party led me inside, and I saw exactly what he was concerned about. To date, no
incidents had been reported about this monster injuring anyone during any of
his forays, but it is common for neighbors to choose to not report vicious
animals in an effort to keep peace in the neighborhood. Personally, I had never
in my life handled one like this. I have seen on TV professionals becoming overconfident
in a situation such as the one I was facing, and end up on the internet as the
guy who got wrecked and humiliated by an animal everyone said “had always been
so friendly!”
I slipped on my crack-head frisking gloves and fessed up-
and gently lifted a three-foot iguana out of the ivy plant, carried him out of
the apartment and put him in a kennel in my truck. I named him “Paul.”
Where I work, we are having a dry spell, and it has been hot for a while. My partner has been on vacation, so I have been covering the field a little bit more than usual, and overseeing our rookies as they spend a little bit more time in it. Wednesday I made a rookie handle calls while I helped our local Large Whale Entanglement Team free a 25 foot juvenile gray whale from a nasty mess of gillnet that got caught up in the whale’s mouth. While we cut free a hundred feet of commercial fishing industry trash from this majestic mammal, when we set it free its condition appeared highly compromised. If you care, visit whatever websites advocate more controls over gillnet fishing.
My plan was to bring “Paul” the iguana to our local reptile pro to evaluate his condition and get him back to his owner; two other calls got in the way, and my rookie wasn’t due to be on duty for a couple of hours…
My state’s Penal Code xxx.x allows an animal control officer
to remove an animal from an unoccupied vehicle when conditions may present a
threat to the animal. Dogs do not sweat. They control their body temperature by
panting. If they intake air that is as hot as they are, they will die from heat
exhaustion quickly. The H2 is parked in a lot frequented by surfers who spend
all day on the water, the plate runs to a guy who has a history of leaving his
dog in his car to bake. I have removed this dog from this car before; my fellow
officers have also interacted with the dog owner. Recently, too. Direct sunlight, no ventilation, exterior
temperature of 80F, interior temperature of 100F… the dog is panting like mad and freaking out. I’m taking the dog. And I know I am going to
have an unpleasant conversation with the d-bag when he reclaims it at my
shelter.
But first, I have a rare call regarding an endangered
species: a desert tortoise. In my state, one can receive a permit to keep as a
pet a tortoise that is rare enough that it has been classified as endangered.
This is because their habitat has been encroached upon so much during the last
century, and so many of these animals have been removed unlawfully from the
wild, that the state is simply trying to keep the population viable before we
crush the remainder with our dirt bikes and ATV’s and strip malls. One would
assume that as a keeper of a fifty-year old tortoise, which has been passed
down as a pet for several generations, that the keeper would take some
precautions to ensure the safety of this noble animal. Which is probably why the grown man on the
other end of my phone burst into sobbing tears when I informed him that I had his
family’s legacy in my truck, an unfortunate victim of a neighbor’s SUV.
Back up at the shelter, my conversation with the ass-clown
in the hummer didn’t go well at all, he got his dog back, thankfully free of
heat injury, and he and I both know we will see each other again in the field.
(I will see him first.) The tortoise owner will most likely be investing in a yard
gate that closes. Paul? Turns out his family has TWO iguanas, this is Paul’s
first impound, it is the other iguana which has been impounded twice, the
family is now hopefully inspired to improve their enclosures to prevent future
straying, and scaring of their neighbors. Also? Paul is apparently a girl named
“Lizzy.”
